end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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