I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
