Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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