The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
