Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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