we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
