I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
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