hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
My feet surprised me
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
