He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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