The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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