the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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