i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
