it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Randomize