Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
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