okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Randomize
