I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
