He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
