hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
