Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
