i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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