just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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