Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize
