all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize