We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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