what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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