I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Randomize
