put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I love you. Go after that dick
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
