Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I have grass duct taped all over my body
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
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