I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
