If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
