and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
