there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
we're so committed to being not committed
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
