The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
