we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
false alarm, still single
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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