and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
