I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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