all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
