i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
