we're blogging at a bar
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
