just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
