ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
