I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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