He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
