Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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