I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Randomize
