"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Randomize
