Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
