can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
