I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
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