i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
