If that was your dad, he is hot
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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